Male Attractiveness and Aging

Male-Attractiveness-and-Aging-2(1)Before we get into this topic I have a question:

Who was voted the sexiest man of the year in 1989 and sexiest man of the century in 1999?

For those who don’t know: Sean Connery

Does anyone know how old he was when he was voted most sexy man on Earth?


That’s right:

A majority of women voted a 59 year old man sexier than any other man on the planet.

Not to mention being voted most sexy man of the century at the age of 69.
Today we’re going to talk about male sex appeal and how it’s affected by getting older.

I’m also going to give you 5 tips to maintain your attractiveness past the age of 40.


The Problem

The reason I’m writing this article is that I’ve had a number of older men approach me about this issue. Some were men who’ve just gone through a divorce or were recently widowed.

Mainly these are men who are past the age of 40 and are trying to figure out how they can stand out as older gentlemen.

They generally echoed similar questions:

  • How can I start dressing in a certain way?
  • How can I start to use style?
  • How can I figure out what’s going on here (In terms of how their advancing age was affecting their attractiveness)?


A major concern many of the gentlemen had was how they could date younger women, without running into this dreaded question:

“Oh, is this your daughter?”

Exploring the Problem

Man in a Coffee ShopSo being concerned with style issues for all my readers young and old I set to work.

Me and my team went off and did the research and we found a relevant British study that found the following:

39 is the median age in which a man starts to make the crossover into being considered older.

Since I’m 38 this was a wake up call for me as well and this got me thinking about how my age was going to affect people’s perception of me.

Even though I’m happily married to an amazing woman I still want to appear attractive (If for no other reason than that my wife keeps on finding me attractive)

Attractiveness is not just about attracting women.It’s also about appearing strong and masculine so that you can attract business partners and clients.

When people see you you want them to be attracted to you on all levels. Without debating the morality or fairness of it multiple studies have shown that attractive people are hired sooner, promoted faster and earn as much as 3 to 4% more than their less-attractive counterparts.

When you’re perceived as attractive you’re seen as more open and approachable and therefore have a better chance of being exposed to more people including potential clients and business partners.

I have to admit that the majority of men who raised this issue with me were simply concerned with appearing attractive to women but now it should be clear to all you men that attractiveness is important for all men.

So while these following 5 tips were originally developed for older gentlemen concerned by their appearance, they are valuable guidelines for men at any stage of their life.

Man in Sports Jacket1. Look Available

A lot of the men I spoke to were recently divorced and were in their mid-forties.

After almost a lifetime of their spouse looking after them and choosing their clothes many men found that not only did they not appear available or presentable, they had no idea how to go about appearing so.

Some of them went through a long time period during which they simply didn’t care about their appearance and their confidence was way down.

So the first step is for you to figure out how to look presentable so that when you walk into a store or any type of establishment the single women there will look at you and quickly determine:

“Hey, this guy is on the market. He looks interesting.”

The thing that plays in your favor here is that women are less concerned about age than men generally are and it’s not the thing that will turn them off. It’s your appearance that counts in this situation.

Women often make the assumption that an older man is no longer available and the reason is simply that it’s true: most single women know that men past the age of 30 or 40 are married or involved in long-term relationships.

Dress the Part

So now you need to send a crystal-clear signal that you’re available. Since it’s the first thing women are going to notice you have to dress the part. Basically you need to start dressing like a man:

Try to throw on that sports jacket you never wear (You may have to dry-clean it) or if you’re not into sports jackets, start wearing more casual button-up shirts that are going to show that you care about yourself and that you haven’t given up on life.

Be Sure to Groom

The other aspect of your appearance you need to look at is to pay careful attention to your grooming.

Make sure you read my article on the 7 Grooming Mistakes Men Make

My regular readers will know I’ve talked about how you tend to sprout hair from everywhere as you grow older. You have to make sure you have impeccable grooming habits.

Once you’ve covered your wardrobe and your grooming make sure that you smile and engage with people to show that you are available.

2. Consider Dyeing your hair

A lot of men are starting to get gray at this age but this need not be a problem because in the dating scene there’s nothing wrong with dying your hair.

If you consider this I would recommend going to a salon and speaking with the people there especially if you don’t know what you’re doing.

You can be as forthright as you’re comfortable with but basically you want to relay to them that you want to upgrade your look and you’re interested in dying your hair for that purpose.

hair dye

Once you’re committed to this you have to maintain a regular schedule of dying your hair to keep it from looking odd which is what will happen when your natural hair color starts growing back in and displacing the colored hair.

This advice is especially relevant if you’ve gone prematurely gray or if you’re in your 50s or 60s and you’ve gone naturally gray and men who are looking to start dating a woman 20 or 30 their junior should also seriously consider following this route.

I have a friend that’s married to a beautiful Russian woman that’s 25 years younger than he is. Since he’s in his 70s she is still relatively older but there is that significant age gap.

In all the time I’ve known him I never thought about it and then it dawned on me that he’s been dyeing his hair for a long time. I should have known but I simply wasn’t paying attention.

One day it just struck me and I said to him: “Wow! Good job, Roger.”

Though I’ve mentioned 50s and 60s there is absolutely no reason you shouldn’t continue doing this into your 60s or 70s or to start doing it at that age.

More important than anything else is to make sure you have fun. This is something you do for yourself and you don’t have to worry about what other people are going to say or think.

If it makes you feel more confident or younger then go for it.

Man Jogging in the Morning3.Take Care of Your Body

Nothing makes a man look older than if he’s carrying on a lot of extra weight especially in the face. If you start getting a double chin you need to reconsider how you’re taking care of your body.

The number 1 thing you can do to help you with this is to watch what you eat.

Other than that, there are some amazing resources out there and one I can recommend is:

Abel James at Fat-Burning Man, who is a personal friend with great free podcasts, books and other resources that you can use.

Just make sure you pay attention – you’re never going to be able to outrun your mouth when it comes to the food you put into it.

The second part of taking care of your body is to exercise. It’s important that you not focus on only one thing so if you usually just do cardio try adding some weight training and vice versa.

Some very knowledgeable gentlemen on this topic are:

Tom Ventuno at Burn the Fat Feed the Burn
Ryan Masters at Sparta Strength

There is tons of information out there so you have no excuse. Some of your options are:

  • join a gym
  • join a specific program
  • get a trainer
  • work with a dietitian

Whatever you decide on you have to focus on getting your body in shape if you want to attract women or just want to improve your attractiveness.

Man-teeth-brushing-with-electric-toothbrush4. Take care of your Teeth

Like many other things, time takes it’s toll on the teeth of older men and you find your teeth yellowing as you grow older or even have some of your teeth fall out.

Not having healthy teeth is something that is a significant negative factor for especially younger women and is a major reason they look at older men as something they don’t want to be associated with

If you used to smoke or have just neglected your teeth in the past you’re probably going to want to look at something like getting your teeth whitened.

If yellow or discolored teeth are a problem you have be sure to talk to your dentist and if you have really bad teeth and a bit of money you may want to consider veneers as an option.

These are a unique way of upgrading your teeth that will go a long way towards making you look more attractive.

If you want to know more feel free to read my Ultimate Teeth Whitening Guide and my review ofDazzlePro’s excellent range of teeth whitening products (which I personally used).

5. Take Care of Your Skin

If you’re already in your 50s or 60s and you’ve neglected your skin in the past this is going to be a bit tougher .

You’ll have to consider products that have ingredients like retinol DMAE and MSM. These are ingredients in some more expensive and exclusive skincare products that will help you improve the condition of your skin.

No idea what I’m talking about? Go and read my article Man’s Guide to Lotion | How to Buy Men’s Face and Body Products.

If you’re in your 30s or 40s you have a bit more leeway but you should immediately start paying attention to cleaning your skin. You can start by using something like a face mask that exfoliates your skin and follow up with a lotion that will lock in moisture.

Men who care of their skin in their 30s and 40s will find themselves in much better condition when they get to their 50s and 60 and won’t have a lot of the problems they may otherwise have.

For those of you who may be a bit older or men who have skin problems we have a whole range of videos and articles dealing with taking care of your skin.

Man Taking Care of His Skin

Bonus Recommendation:

Have Confidence

One of the great things about getting older is that you’ve been through life and you’ve become a lot more confident and this is the great thing. You’ve started to break away from the mainstream and you start to realize this is your one shot in life.

Make sure you capitalize on this confidence. Know that you’re going to have a great time and go live your life the way you want to and stop worrying about the opinion of others.

This is a major factor I’ve seen in men who marry women 25 or 30 years their junior and if that’s what you want, go for it.

And before you make the mistake of ignoring them, be sure to look at those ladies your own age. You may well find that you find a gem there that you won’t find in a younger companion.

I certainly hope these tips are useful. The important thing now is to get out there and act on this advice and make sure you look at the links and resources I’ve shared here and if you have any questions be sure to contact me and I’ll do my best to help you.